6. The Paradox of Being
DoHH – Division
April 4th 2023
Could I?
Can I?
What lies ahead?
Is it new?
Is it influenced by yesterday?
Will I repeat the mistakes of my past,
Or carve a new path forward?
How can I?
How should I?
What am I living for?
Do I already have it?
Will I find it?
When? How?
What lurks in the shadows—
My worst fears or my greatest joy?
Will it cripple me,
Or will I face it?
When? How?
I am a lot of questions,
Yet I hold even more answers.
I am doubt and hope braided together.
I am everything—
Yet nothing.
A vast ocean of potential,
A single drop in the infinite sea.
I stop when I should run.
I run when I should stop.
I am an enigma, yet explicit.
I know who I am, what I want, and where I am going—
Yet, at times, these truths feel out of body,
Like foreign concepts,
Echoes of a version of myself I know but I have yet to meet.
But it is me.
A tapestry of contradictions,
Threads of the beginning, the present, and the end,
Woven together into a beautiful creation,
That against all odds thrives.
Thrives through learning.
Through unlearning.
Through relearning.
Every day is new.
Every day is practice.
Every day is a dawn breaking through,
A call by the universe to myself;
To existence,
To consciousness,
To bliss.
I AM.
Deborah Nyamu,
DoHH, 2025